The Pinnacle Weekend was once reserved for those achieving and exceeding in sales metrics: New Activations, Accessory Sales and Features. The incentivized path was that which added the most pre-decimal numbers to a customer's monthly bill. Recently though, to prove the doubters wrong and get the numbers up, The Company finally started incorporating Customer Satisfaction scores into the required metrics. That elusive JD Powers Piece of Acrylic would find shelf space, dammit!
Sales alone would no longer get you to the best weekend of work you ever had! The cherry-pickers, the hustlers and those "sales" guys were all ousted. The 1% was overturned and yours truly has been given access in a customer service coup.
The Pinnacle is to reward the top reps in the West (14 states) and sometimes takes place in such exciting destinations as Park City, UT and Honolulu, HI. This year, when my ticket to ride comes in, Wifey and I pack up the bags, load up the car and drive the hour it takes to get to to Dana Point, CA--five minutes from my parents' house. It's not that I'm ungrateful, but this is the second time I've been rewarded with a trip home. The first time followed a stellar 3rd Place finish on Jeopardy! which I would later forfeit so as to not have to pay the taxes on a $4000 trip. 'Put it to you this way': Dana Point is a beach in Southern California's Orange County. That means March is mid-60 degrees at best, cloudy and damp. So all those other reps heading to "Sunny SoCal" were in for a real surprise. At least everyone knows how to pack for Park City in March.
"God really wants you to go to Dana Point." Wifey assures me with a Field of Dreams destiny.
"Meh."
"And the drinks are all free."
"We'll go."
We arrive. I instantly begin calculating the salary costs of people checking us in. 15? 20 staffers? Just to read the names of a couple hundred? A photographer??? I've begun doing this, this critically suspicious accounting of "How much did these brochures cost?" and "What's the best possible price for buying Hi-Liters in bulk?"
As I stare at the extravagance around me, Wifey implores me to "let it happen." I do.
"Here are your badges. Make sure you wear them at all times while on the resort. And which two of these day-time activities would you like to participate in?" The cheery voice makes me feel guilty for not being more impressed. I attitude-adjust and look at the list.
"Well, let's see. I guess Whale-Watching and...um the Art Walk?"
The golf reservations had all been taken, we'd both already taken surfing lessons, SCUBA freaks Wifey out and the rest were all Arts and Crafts. I saw a couple of names scribbled under "Basket-weaving" and I shivered. As it would turn out, since neither suffering the colder conditions of whale-watching nor the amateur water colors of local artists sounded appealing, we would ultimately bail on the two events for which we signed up anyway.
"And we'll see you at the welcome reception tonight! Get ready for those Pinnacle-adas!!?
"Our what?
"Pinnacle-adas! It's the official drink of the weekend! It's a Piña Colada but with the name..." my ears spare my brain and seal themselves instinctually.
We go to our room.
She reads the next name from the list.
